Are you sitting comfortably?

This morning whilst running around the house doing my usual sweeping motion to pile toys into one corner, so at least some of the room looks temporarily tidy, I half caught a piece on Lorraine (or should I say Kate Garraway) where they were inviting people to comment on a story about a pregnant lady not being given a seat on public transport. 'That old chestnut? I could write for days about that' I thought, and made a note to track down the article they were discussing, later.

With half the story in my mind, I went about my morning, writing this post in my head. I'd already decided what the article said and, more importantly, what I was going to say about it. 

I was going to start by saying that whoever this person was, they were probably another country bumpkin who just doesn’t get that if you want a seat on public transport in London you have to ask for it. I thought this because I was once that pregnant country bumpkin standing around on buses, waiting for people to notice my delicate condition. I was standing for a very long time until I realised no one noticed me or my bump, and if I wanted to sit down I would have ask people to move. 

Secondly, why do just pregnant women get all the press, what about everyone else? Specifically the old lady I saw on the bus the other day, with a zimmer frame and about to keel over as she was diabetic and her sugar levels had dropped (she also had sciatica, her daughter told me all of this). Not an able bodied soul in the priority seats got up to offer her their place. 

Another factor I wanted to highlight was the whole fear of mistaking someone for being pregnant who isn’t. I’ve been there and it felt infinitely worst than actually having to ask someone to give me their seat or as much as the sharp pain in my heels that developed 6 months into pregnancy.

I recall that by my second pregnancy I was such a natural when it came to turfing people out of their seats on public transport, I didn't even bother getting one of those fancy 'baby on board' badges, available from TFL on application (email babyonboard@tfl.gov.uk). I was a pro at ensuring my backside was comfortably parked throughout most journeys. I wasn't always confident, I didn't always like doing it and there were times when I might have half sobbed as I muttered the words, 'Can I sit down please, I'm pregnant’. Then when I sat down, I would quite often spend the next ten minutes questioning myself over why I felt the need to use such a lowly, apologetic tone to do it. 

Hence my message was to urge all you pregnant ladies out there to take courage, remember that people might just have the fear about wrongly identifying you as pregnant so make it easy for them by making the first move. It isn’t easy but no one is going to say no. 

Then, finally, I found the ACTUAL article and guess what, the pregnant lady had asked for a seat and the seated said no. 

I don’t mind admitting I felt a little sheepish and quite angry. This lady asked for a seat and was refused? Suddenly the bottom dropped out of my soapbox. Never once on all my escapades, even before I sported the most legitimate of bumps, had anyone ever turned down my request for a seat

There I was, all argument and no solution whatsoever. The woman had, quite proactively I thought, asked South West Trains if they might consider giving her a pass to sit in first class when the train was full. Oh the relief, a sensible solution (which could also be applicable to anyone needing priority seating i.e. elderly or disabled). Wait a second, South West Trains also said no? Apparently when you’re on a train and you feel unwell the correct procedure is to tell a guard or pull the emergency cord. Seems a little drastic, not to mention the number of people who would leap off their seats in a second, if it meant you refrained from pulling the emergency cord and bringing the train to a calamitously jolting standstill. 

Growing up in Hampshire, in the days before automatic train doors, I remember South West Trains went through a phase of covering their carriage doors with stickers that read:

‘Save us time, save your time, please shut the door’ however, one sly but oddly very prolific graffiti artist couldn’t resist a minor alteration, which bearing in mind their attitude on this occasion, seems very appropriate ’Save us time, save your time, please... take the bus’. 

For those who refused to give up their seats? I now feel infinitely less guilty about ignoring the old woman who approached me the other day, wanting directions, she definitely wasn’t pregnant and she wasn’t in need of a seat. Karmically speaking, I am immaculate, well almost.  

Did you sign the scroll?

A Monday evening microblog, linking to a heartwarming Youtube clip, looking back at some of the highlights of Precious cargo raising money for Motorcycle Outreach  HERE (yes that is Amanda Holden!) I am proud to say I signed the scroll. 

For more information about the fantastic work that Motorcycle Outreach do please click here 

Put on your breast expression

On a day where UKAMB (UK Association for Milk Banking) are inviting people to take part in a a survey about Milk Banking (storage and re-distribution of donated breast milk to neonatal units around the country) I thought I would share an article I wrote last year, in conjunction with the London Milk Bank at Queen Charlotte's & Chelsea hospital, for my local NCT newsletter. 

‘You did what?’ I stare in disbelief as our dinner guests file back into the sitting room. ‘I didn’t think you’d mind’ says my grinning partner who has just revealed to me that, while I was upstairs settling our youngest son, he had shown our friends the contents of the freezer. ‘Someone’s been busy, what you going to do with it all?’ my friend asks ‘because if you carry on at this rate you've got enough to last you a year’

The fact was that, having given birth to my second son, I had decided that having struggled to maintain any kind of store of breastmilk first time round, this time I would get myself into good routine of expressing and freezing milk on a daily basis.  Now that my son was 3 months old I was barely able to shut the freezer door.

It was at this point, when my partner started giving guests guided tours of the milk factory, that I realized that if I was going to ever store food in my freezer again I would have do something. I had heard rumours from friends about the possibility of donating breast milk to premature baby units in hospitals and so I consulted Google to see what information I could find.  I quickly came across details of the London Milk Bank, a division of the United Kingdom Association for Milk banking (UKAMB)

I clicked on ‘Becoming a donor’ and completed the application form. I was then posted out a blood test kit and a batch of sterile bottles so I could start expressing and freezing milk immediately. I took the kit along to my Doctors and within a couple of weeks received a letter stating that I was now an official Milk Donor and could arrange for the contents of my freezer to be collected. I was stunned at how easy it was and of course I couldn’t help but a feel a little chuffed when I was able to hand over 6 litres of breast milk to the Milk Bank courier. 

Finding out about UKAMB I felt appalled that my only initial motivation for doing this had just been to make room in my freezer. Due to the advances of modern medicine thankfully more and more premature infants are surviving which in turn creates a greater need for donor milk and the process required to become a donor is brilliantly simple.

The storing and distributing of breast milk, known as milk banking, is a practice that is now over a 100 years old. Gillian Weaver, Manager of the Queen Charlotte & Chelsea Hospital Milk Bank outlines why there has never been a greater need for women to donate their breast milk: ‘Of course donor breast milk is only ever second best to the infant’s own mother’s milk and shouldn’t be a substitute for every effort to help and support a new mother to establish lactation and provide her baby with her own milk. However, the realities of having a tiny and possibly very sick baby can impact on a mother’s ability to express enough milk, particularly in the vitally important early days.  When babies are born at less than 26 weeks gestation, the mother may not yet be ready to lactate fully as a result of incomplete developmental changes within her breast tissue which in turn enable breast milk production.  All mothers of sick and premature infants experience the stress, tiredness and anxiety that can also interfere with lactation.  Additionally, there are the mothers whose babies are born early because of their own ill health and who need life saving cancer treatments, or those who spend time in intensive care because of problems that arise during childbirth or as a result of pre existing health problems.  These are the times when donor milk is on hand in some neonatal units to ensure infants can still be fed with breast milk and when the availability of donor milk can be so very supportive for the mother. 
Given the fact that breast milk is now unequivocally the preferred means of feeding premature infants and the research evidence shows they are less likely to develop life threatening gut infections, the increasing interest in human milk banking is understandable’

There are some requirements to becoming a donor: you can’t smoke or consume more than 4 units of alcohol a week and you must start donating before your baby is 6 months old. You can donate as little or as much as you like although most milk banks ask donors to express each day for at least a month to justify the cost of all the screening and the blood tests. A premature baby may drink less than 20 ml a day so whatever you can give is very highly valued, this is beautifully summed up by UKAMB’s mantra : ‘Every drop counts’ 

Want to find out more about milk banking?
 Visit the United Kingdom Association for Milk Banking (UKAMB) website: www.ukamb.org. If you are interested in becoming a donor go to the ‘Your Milk Bank’ section and find your closest milk bank. 

Of course you don’t just have be lactating to help, UKAMB is an organization that is desperately short of badly needed funds, you can donate immediately by clicking ‘Donate to UKAMB’ on the front page of their website.

Or contact Gillian Weaver, Manager of the London Milk Bank at Queen Charlotte's & Chelsea hospital, on Gillian.weaver@imperial.nhs.uk for more information about becoming a donor or supporting the milk bank. 

Complete UKAMB's survey about Milk Banking HERE

A Saturday evening product review: MAGIC £1.98 NAIL VARNISH

So what's so special about this rather unremarkable bottle of Rimmel nail varnish? 

This was one of the purchases I found on my search for budget items to review (which I have paid for myself and have not been sponsored in any way) and I expected the usual outcome of my nail varnishes. I'll forget to put marigolds on to do the washing up and so my varnished nails won't even make it past lunch time. 

I have a bottle of Chanel Vernis, it is a beautiful dark grey that shines like a mirror. However, if I so much as have a shower I come out with a chip on every nail and I expected this, with it's £1.98 price tag, to be no different. 

I was brilliantly surprised. So a little photo of freshly applied nail varnish (please try and ignore my wrinkly fingers)

Now follows the after shot and when I say after, I mean after a day of some very glamourous activities including washing up, bathing children, showering and scrubbing out my bread bin (who doesn't do this of a saturday afternoon)

There are a couple of chips here and there but overall I am stunned it has survived so well. Once again this is a budget find that I will absolutely be stocking up on. Nuff said. 

A book review of a love story for Valentine's day

Audrey Niffenegger’s ‘The Raven Girl’ 

I know I am not alone in my love of Niffenegger’s ‘The Time Traveller’s Wife’. I remember thinking the premise of the story was thoroughly off putting: a time traveller, who falls in love, but has no control over his body when it decides to travel through time. It all sounded a bit 'Quantum Leap' for me, but I was so glad I persevered as it is easily now in my top ten reads. I had heard rumours of Niffenegger writing other books that included her own illustrations and so was very intrigued when I came across ‘The Raven Girl’, a gothic fairy tale about a girl who is half raven, half human. True to form, for me this was another off-putting introduction to a story, which captivated my interest even more. 

The story is set in East of East, a desolate suburb that could be anywhere, although there is something about the Postman’s ethos that is distinctly English, perhaps it is the nightmares he has about email. 

One day the postman, whilst delivering to a new address beneath a raven’s nest finds a female raven and, thinking her injured, takes her home and cares for her. They fall in love and one day she lays an egg which hatches to become a ‘raven girl’: immaculately human in every way apart from her voice, she can only crow and caw like a bird. She never learns to talk and can only communicate with her mother to whom she laments about her lack of wings. She grows up and her time comes to leave home to go to University to study biology. There she meets a doctor, a Frankenstine figure who specialises in transforming people and ‘improving’ them, giving women horns and men forked tongues. The raven girl convinces him to give her wings. However, a boy who has observed her in her classes notices her absence from university and tracks her down to the hospital where her transformation is taking place, with shocking and tragic consequences. 

This short synopsis by no means summarises the story in its entirety but it does set the scene. At this point I intended to list the issues I had with the character development, or rather the lack of it and the fact the whole thing was simply too surreal for me. However, there was one huge factor to this story that I wasn’t aware of until the end which changed my entire interpretation completely.

The reason this story was written was not initially to be read, but to viewed by an audience, as it was danced before you on the stage. This book is the synopsis of a ballet written by Niffenegger for the Royal Opera House. At this point everything falls into place. The lack of flowing explanation throughout is no longer required. Immediately my mind was ignited as the characters, assisted with feathered puppetry, came alive and began to dance. 

However, there is a very important element to this book that I have not yet touched on: the illustrations. For me, these charmingly simple aquatints (water colouresque etchings) are easily the best thing about this book and I keep going back to them. They are childlike in their style but still maintain artistic integrity. I am always a sucker for a book with pictures. I am a great believer that even if the story isn’t present, if there is good artwork then it is no time wasted. Is this judging a book by it’s cover? Of course, how else would the comic book industry, for example, survive if it wasn’t for an enticing front cover to make you pick the book up in the first place?

If you are a fan of Niffenegger’s work generally then I would say absolutely read this book. Once again her theme of the ‘super human’ and the doctor that assists in ‘fixing’ or rather helping them assimilate into our world is recurrent here. 

If I could own this production though, I wouldn’t make it into a ballet, I would animate Niffenegger’s beautiful pictures. 

Read a review of the actual ballet HERE

Read some more reviews of the book HERE

Out of college and out of the closet...a note on NFL Prospect Michael Sam

Footage of American newsreader Dale Hansen’s inspired response to negative comments made regarding NFL prospect Michael Sam revealing that he is gay has gone viral in less than 24 hours (VIEW IT HERE). 

This groundbreaking breath of fresh air in the sports arena deserves more time than I can currently give it however I can offer a link to THIS ARTICLE that (forgive the pun) kicks things off beautifully. To be continued.  

A happy accident which gave birth to these downright tasty, if somewhat radioactive-looking, beauties.

Mint Choc Chip Cupcakes

So in my first foray into food blogging, my initial plans were to make THIS recipe for buttercream filled cupcakes which I came across on google. I have to confess I generally find cupcakes, despite their recent revival, to the extent that any trendy vintage teashop worth their Royal Albert would not open their doors without several platters of them on display, generally taste quite dull. However, this recipe’s initial description, along with enticing picture, pushed all my sugar-coated buttons. A cupcake filled with buttercream AND coated in chocolate is, without a doubt, the kind of jazz my cupcakes would be playing. However, on further reading it swiftly transpired that if you actually followed this recipe word for word then you would just end up with buttercream iced cupcakes with no creamy filling whatsoever. I could have sobbed. However, I had toddlers who needed entertaining so we pressed on. 

Cooking with toddlers is a real skill that doesn’t come easily to me. So I spend a lot of time scouring around for recipes that are really simple. If all the ingredients can all be shoved into one bowl, that I can pass to one of my little assistants to stir and splatter as they please, before swiftly decanting into cake tin then it's a winner. Generally if I’ve managed to hold their attention this long then I am happy, although ordinarily they will have moved onto greater things elsewhere in the house, involving lego, superglue and curtains.

This recipe, despite not fitting it’s own description, ticked the simplicity boxes. However, whilst my eldest and I merrily chucked the ingredients into a bowl for him to set about mixing, I proceeded to have a little mishap which involved mistaking peppermint essence for vanilla.  

I feel like most of my baking projects tend to become salvage operations and the realisation that this was no exception, hit me at the same time as the aroma of my now mint flavoured cupcake mix. However, I take pride in my silver lining approach to cooking and have managed to turn round some potentially horrendous creations. Of course, I could just have very dishonest family members committed to giving me lip service about the inaccurate greatness of my food, but if that’s my bubble then please may it remain intact, for now. 

So after a quick rethink, some additions and an overhaul of the icing process please find the re-born cupcake recipe below:

If I had more time I would tweak the ingredients as this makes a whopping 36 cupcakes which not only fed my kids and their friends but also everyone at my partner's poker night

Preparation time:15min. Cooking time: 20min  

Ingredients

• 375g plain flour
• 400g caster sugar
• 30g unsweetened cocoa powder
• 2 teaspoons bicarbonate of soda
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 2 eggs
• 250ml milk
• 250ml water
• 250ml vegetable oil
• 1 teaspoon peppermint extract
• Approx 50g dark chocolate chips

Icing ingredients.

• 450g icing sugar
• 1 tsp peppermint essence
• 3 tbsp hot water
• Green food colouring (I use the gel but you need hardly any at all unless, like me, you like a halloween-esque cupcake)
• 50g Dark Chocolate roughly broken into pieces
• Couple of drops of olive oil 

Instructions

1. Preheat your oven to 190C/Gas 5. 
2. Line 36 cake tin holes with paper cases.(Or cook in batches if, like me, your biggest cake tin only fits 24)
3. In a large bowl, mix together the flour, sugar, cocoa, bicarbonate of soda and salt. 
4. Then make a well in the centre of your mixture and pour in the eggs, milk, water, oil and peppermint essence and mix well.
   
5. Fill each cupcake case half-full of cake mix.
6. Once they are all filled then sprinkle a few chocolate drops into each individual case of cake mix. As the mix is quite runny if you do this before hand, they will all just sink to the bottom. 
7. Bake in preheated oven for around 15-20 minutes or until a skewer inserted into the centre of the cake comes out clean. Leave to cool completely
   

Instructions for icing

1. Put the kettle on and while it boils sift your icing sugar into a bowl 
2. Add 3 tbsp of your freshly boiled water, the peppermint essence and the food colouring to the icing sugar and mix until it forms a thick green paste
   
3. Using either a spoon or a pallet knife place a large blob of your green icing on top of your cooled cupcake and smooth it gently to the edge.
   
4. Next place a saucepan of water on the hob with a glass bowl sitting on top on the pan. Make sure your bowl isn’t touching the water beneath. Add your chocolate pieces and then heat the water until it’s gently simmering. Once the chocolate is melted, stir in a couple of drops of oil to stop it from congealing and remove from the heat. 
5. Using a spoon, drizzle the melted chocolate over the tops of your iced cupcakes and leave them in a cool place to set.